awe

Yes, I know it's 1:30am and yes, I know my 16 year old daughter is still out on a Saturday night.  The laundry is done, my YW lesson is finished, the song I need to play is polished, lists have been made, receipts are categorized for the end of month budget, and the rest of the family is sound asleep in bed (all but Sophie who is spending the long weekend on Lake Mead with friends).

So, what's a busy mom to do?  How about completely losing yourself watching youtube videos - there is some really great stuff out there! Tonight I have been enlightened by the Discovery channel and have to share this clip - you're going to love it. Enjoy:

Is it just me, or did watching this bring tears to your eyes too?  (probably just me ;).  We KNOW this feeling, that tingling sensation deep in my soul that tells me something magical is happening.  Like last night for instance - I stepped onto the back patio to water the flower pots just as a brilliant full moon was rising over the mountain ridge and creating willowy black silhouettes out of the ridge line trees.  It was magnificent, it took my breath away and I stood there for a moment, grateful for the timing and taking it in, mesmerized by the beauty and brilliant light of a full moon rising.

AWE.

These moments are what I live for and unfortunately, the pull of viewing someone else's moments of awe (i.e. my Instagram addiction) can rob me of these real moments that need to be experienced in the flesh.  Pictures are fabulous and give a momentary prick of enjoyment, especially when the photograph is particularly stunning. However, nothing compares to the pure rush of joy that fills the soul with something truly inspires.  It's exhilarating, and that's why this video recreated those moments of awe so perfectly . . . reminded me of my "responsibility to awe."

It made me reflect on the times when I feel that rush and I try to record as many of my "awe moments" in an informal journal where I record my little miracles.  It's been a few weeks since I've recorded anything solid, so for posterity's sake on the blog, here are a few things that bring on that giddy sense of awe, or "radiant ecstasy" as he says in the clip:

• Finding the Milky Way on a clear night, in a place far away from city lights.  Watching for shooting stars.
• Reading bedtime stories, singing songs, and tucking in my little ones.  Goodnight kisses, good morning kisses, snuggle time under the covers.
• Meaningful conversations with my teens.  Hearing "I love you" over the phone or getting a text with the same message.
• Flowers.  Really looking deeply into the blossom of a flower, any variety, and being blown away by the intricacy of creation.
• Art.  Art and sculpture move me.  The vibrant energy inside a museum is thrilling, especially when I come across a painting that immediately draws me in by its beauty, its struggle, its humanness.  I never leave a world class museum without feeling a deep sense of awe.
• Laughter.  Especially the open hearted giggles of children, and even better when it's my own children sharing a moment of laughter together.
• Holding a newborn.  Is there anything more awe inspiring than a child who is so fresh from heaven?  Snuggling a baby and drinking in that sweet baby smell will bring a sense of awe to even the hardest of hearts.
• Connecting deeply with someone and opening your heart.
• Nature.  The beauty of this earth overwhelms me at time with it's magnificence.  I've been brought to tears many times just by the simple majesty of a sunrise/sunset, the mountains, fields, oceans, rivers, and deserts.  The mere variety on this planet is enough to bring a sense of awe into anyone's life!
• Architecture.  Exploring the intricacies of cathedrals, old buildings, sky scrapers, and especially historic homes tends to heighten my sense of wonder.  
• Music.  I'll never forget the first time I really listened to Beethoven's 3rd Symphony (Eroica) - I was so blown away, I sat in my car, in the dark, to finish listening to the entire symphony.  It was an experience I'll never forget.  Music, especially hearing something so pure, creates a radiant sense of awe.

Just a little something to think about this coming week.  And no, Caroline isn't home yet and it's 2am.  Time to call and get that kid back where she belongs so I can get to bed :).

Here's to finding and holding onto those moments of awe, wonder, and inspiration . . .

preparing for the inevitable

OK, here goes.  It's been an exciting week of college notifications, friends receiving mission calls, preparation for graduation and senior trip.  I'm just ripe for another sentimental post about my child growing up and preparing to leave the nest.

But instead of reading my ramblings, I'll share some thoughts from an insightful author who just "gets it" and has the uncanny brilliance and ability to put my feelings into these touching words.  Thank you Katrina Kenison for your wisdom in finding the beauty of my very own "ordinary days."

Get a tissue . . .

ah, temple square

I am so blessed.  Brilliant, fall mornings like today make me ever so grateful to live where I live and have the myriad of opportunities available out my door each day.  This morning I decided to get back to my once-a-month temple visits downtown (didn't happen in the summer).  After getting parked and strolling onto the gorgeous temple grounds, I was kicking myself for not coming more often.  The flowers today were stunning.  Absolutely breathtaking.  Truly a sight to behold in September.

My temple visits never fail to strengthen my faith and hope that all is well, increase my love for others, and especially sustain my conviction and testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ.  The more I study, I mean really study, read, and ponder the words of modern and ancient prophets, the more convinced I am that this IS indeed the restored gospel in its purity.  My testimony is firm and I am committed to teaching my children these precious truths.

I love the gospel, it is everything to me.  I feel a little guilty that I don't take advantage of the many temples within a short distance of my home, but after today I will try to go more often . . . especially when I can drop the girls off at school and be downtown to the Salt Lake Temple in 15 minutes with time to spare to walk the grounds and drink in the beauty of it all.  Indeed, what a blessing.

I couldn't help myself:

 

 These flowers were just in front of the First Presidency building - AMAZING with the morning sun.

Autumn daisies, I'm in love!

too easily pleased?

“It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.” 

― C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory, and Other Addresses

words to live by

"Making people feel important is part of courtesy, so it's important to remember that whether or not people remember what we say or do,
they do remember how we made them feel. . .  

Always be kinder than necessary

because you can never be too kind.”

Michael Josephson

The perfect example of this sentiment: Mother Teresa

yosemite

"Everyone needs beauty as well as bread, 

places to play in and pray in, where nature 

may heal and cheer and give strength 

to the body and soul alike . . ."

John Muir

 Giant sequoias in Mariposa Grove

 1800 yr. old "Grizzly Giant"

 Yosemite Valley - beautiful morning for a hike . . .

off we go . . . straight up from the valley floor 3.8 miles/3300 ft. elevation gain

on our way to to the top of these granite walls

 getting closer

LOVED these trees 

we made it- time to SIT!

 aahhh, yes - taking in the views while eating lunch!

Minor freak-out from Chris as I walked out on this rock . . .

 this is as close to the edge as Chris would venture

 The river right before it heads over the cliff

 Yosemite Point - unbelievable, majestic, breathtaking - best views in the park!

 heading back down - the sun reflecting on Half Dome

 El Capitan . . . next trip we'll hike to the top and watch the rock climbers summit!

I don't think I'll ever be able to aptly express how I feel about Yosemite.  Obviously, I haven't visited all the national parks our country has to offer, but out of the parks I have been to, Yosemite is and probably always will be my favorite.  There is a spirit here that touches my spirit and rejuvenates my soul.  The place seems to me a living, breathing entity, which, like a person is constantly changing as the day progresses from early dawn, to bright afternoon, to dusk, to blackest of night.  We were privileged this trip to not only hike to the top of the tallest waterfall in North America, but descend by a full moon (thank goodness just the last 1/3 mile) and then witness that moon rise over half dome from the meadow and light up the impressive, towering granite face of El Capitan.  I will NEVER forget the view of Yosemite valley that night from "tunnel view" as we were departing the park and heading back to our hotel . . .

and hope to return to see it again.

this christmas . . .

This Christmas, mend a quarrel. Seek out a forgotten friend. Dismiss suspicion and replace it with trust. Write a letter. Give a soft answer. Encourage youth. Manifest your loyalty in word and deed. Keep a promise. Forgo a grudge. Forgive an enemy. Apologize. Try to understand. Examine your demands on others. Think first of someone else. Be kind. Be gentle. Laugh a little more. Express your gratitude. Welcome a stranger. Gladden the heart of a child.
Take pleasure in the beauty and wonder of the earth. 

Speak your love and then speak it again.

President Howard W. Hunter

forget me not

Every year I look forward to the annual Relief Society meeting held the week before the October general conference.  It is always a spiritual lift to listen to the RS general presidency and a member of the First Presidency speak to the women of the church.  So yesterday evening a friend and I headed downtown to the conference center to hear the inspirational messages and feel the beautiful spirit of so many righteous women gathered together in one place.

I especially felt a connection with Elder Uchtdorf's sincere and timely message of never forgetting the simple things in life that will bring an added measure of joy and peace.  He used the analogy of the forget-me-not flower and mentioned five things we should never "forget," just like the five tiny, perfect blue petals on this delicate, unpretentious flower.

never forget . . .

1.  to be patient with yourself.  Part of our mortal experience is to have weaknesses. We are not perfect and no one expects us to be, especially our Heavenly Father.  Be compassionate with yourself.  We have a tendency to compare our weaknesses to others' strengths, and by so doing feel we will never measure up.  However, by staying on the long path of discipleship, our weaknesses will eventually become our STRENGTHS.

2.  the difference between a good sacrifice and a foolish sacrifice. Be wise when committing our time and energy.  Sacrifice is worthwhile when we are sacrificing something "good" for something "better."  Our time is limited - choose wisely.

3.  to be happy now.  Never fail to notice the blessings that surround you daily.  Don't be miserable while waiting for your "golden ticket" - that elusive goal that you believe will bring happiness.   Be vigilant and watch for the everyday miracles and blessings.

4.  the "why" of the gospel.  Never forget that the gospel is the pathway leading to happiness and peace in this life and a fullness of joy in the life to come.  Seek out the beauty of the "why" we live the gospel and keep our covenants . . . this will transform the mundane into the magnificent.

5.  that the Lord LOVES you.  Never forget that you are a precious daughter of a loving Heavenly Father, that you are never forgotten, and loved with an infinite love.  He loves you because you are His child and are the daughters of His kingdom.  Never forget that His love in your heart can heal any wound and relieve every heartache.

Click here for a few video excerpts from Elder Uchtdorf's talk (it's so much better to hear him relay this message straight from the heart).

BYU Women's Conference 2011

"By small and simple things, 

great things are brought to pass . . ."

Alma 37:6-7, The Book of Mormon

This past week my spiritual well was filled to the brim as I spent two inspirational days at BYU Women's Conference.  The theme for this year's conference, "By small and simple things, great things are brought to pass," couldn't have been more relevant for me at this time in my life.  I am grateful for the beautiful messages and insights that were shared by Virginia Pearce, Elaine Dalton, Kathleen Hughes,  Julie Beck and many others.  These women are true followers of Christ and such examples to me,  their testimonies are sure and unwavering.  How I admire each of them and appreciate their devotion, service, and especially the love they have for Savior and the women of the church.

I know that it is through the small, seemingly insignificant things I do, such as consistent prayer and scripture study, that I see the Lord's hand in my life and witness His tender mercies upon me and my family.  What a blessing it is to know that I have a loving Heavenly Father who does care about me personally and allows my faith to be strengthened and my spirit to grow through difficult mortal experiences, yet allows me to feel His love each day as I continue to reach out in faith, desiring to come closer to the Savior and become more like Him.

I am so thankful for these reminders and hope I can carry the sweet, peaceful spirit of Women's Conference with me throughout the year.

At my feet . . .

Yesterday evening, I walked Liza over to Sugarhouse park while Sophie was having her tennis lesson.  After pushing Liza on the swings, I found an empty park bench to sit and relax while I watched her play in the warm glow of the evening sun.  Then I looked down for a moment, and right there in front of my crossed feet I saw these words staring at me from the pavement.  Pretty cool . . . made me smile, so I took a picture with my phone . . . figured there are days we all could use this reminder :-).

Oh, Dolly!

Yep, Dolly Parton.  Yesterday morning as I was perusing NPR for something to listen to while I go about my morning chores, this story caught my eye.  I know, I'm a total NPR geek - Chris is so patient during our dinner conversations when I begin practically every sentence with, "today on NPR . . . oh, I listened to the greatest interview on NPR . . . oh, you've GOT to hear this music I heard today on NPR."  Tedious I know, but I love sharing my new found knowledge with anyone who will listen, plus it adds something new to our routine "how was your day . . . what's everyone been up to" conversations.

Back to Dolly.  I've never really thought much about Dolly Parton except that she seems like a good person and is an American icon of sorts.  I don't have any of her albums, never been a huge fan, but appreciated her work as an singer/songwriter nonetheless.  Furthermore, who doesn't just adore her role as Truvy in the movie Steel Magnolias?

I was completely captivated by her interview (originally aired in 2001) . . . so much so, that I listened to it again this morning (Terry Gross is one of my favorite NPR hosts - love her style), and it only took about a half hour for my respect and admiration for Dolly to increase hundredfold.  What an incredible person!!  Really, her life story is filled with amazing courage, determination, and an unbelievably strong sense of self.  I have always been impressed with people who have the tenacity to pursue their dreams, without fear of failure or how they are perceived by others, and Dolly exemplifies this perfectly.  She is the real deal . . . aways staying true to herself, her faith and ideals, and those things that make her happy, regardless what anyone might think or say.  She also possesses a sincere and optimistic outlook on life, her relationships with others, and the future.  I just love her confidence . . . it's rare to find someone who's experienced so much success and who can still so easily balance their self assurance with genuine humility.

Thanks Dolly for the inspiration! 

Reflection

I want to share the most eloquent words I've read all year.  They came as a Christmas card greeting from a dear friend of mine, the last will and testament from her grandmother.  So, as we contemplate "new year's resolutions" and the fresh start 2010 offers, I am reminded that it's the simple, everyday moments that I want to place my focus this year . . . living each moment filled with gratitude and joy:

"My love of learning is yours for the seeking.

My excitement over Earth's beauty

Is to be snatched in the fleeting moments

By the observant.

My deep well of contentment will be found

In quiet moments of thankfulness.

The riches I have found in life

are for each of you.

Find them in a baby's smile,

In a friend's warm touch,

In the understanding smile of a stranger,

In the security of family love.

The peace I have

That God is a good and forgiving father

I give to all of you with my love and blessings."

Maurine Conover Jensen (1913-2007)

So, if I die anytime soon, just copy and paste these words into my own "last will and testament." I couldn't express how I feel any better.  Here's to a beautiful 2010.

No words

Wish I were a poet, wish I could adequetly write the things in my heart, but I'll try:

Morning, driving home alone, acoustic "For Everyman" for company, up the canyon hill, lost in my thoughts.

Catch my breath, unparralled beauty, mountain on fire, no words, swallow hard, deeply feel the moment.

Fleeting. Autumn. Peace. Blessed am I.

The Christmas Spirit

Tonight we took the kids to Hale Centre Theatre's production of "A Christmas Carol." It was beautiful, touching, and inspiring. I LOVED it . . . the perfect family activity as we head into Christmas Eve tomorrow and try to keep the childrens' focus on the real reason we celebrate Christmas.